


Operation Hookup

by EddieFook



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Destiel - Freeform, Dog Sam, Dogs, Lots of Hurt, M/M, Oral Sex, Sam is dead, destiel smut, sex as healing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-15
Updated: 2015-07-15
Packaged: 2018-04-09 12:46:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4349339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EddieFook/pseuds/EddieFook
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everyone else thought it was morbid that Dean named his dog after his dead brother. But Sammy the dog ended up being the greatest therapy for a mourning Dean. But will the golden help out an equally lost and saddened Castiel?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Operation Hookup

**Author's Note:**

> So I have been writing for a while and this story just sort of popped into my head and I adore it. I really hope you dig it too!

Everyone else thought it was morbid that Dean named his dog after his dead brother.

Dean didn’t. Sammy had died eight years ago when he was twenty two, and Dean at thirty four had realized his life was going to be by himself  he got a dog. And when he went to the pound, hearing his brother’s voice in the back of his head ranting about puppy mills and pet shops, he looked and saw a deep red golden retriever.

Yup, it was Sam.

The dog was a year old and spunky and laid back at the same time. He would get excited about squirrels on their morning walk and look at Dean in eager puppy mode, but then he was content to lounge on the couch (a rule broken in about five minutes of sad eyes just _staring_ at Dean) with Dean and popcorn.

So Dean was kind of happy with his life. Sure he had no one, but he had Sammy and he was enough.

Sammy also had a hidden talent that Dean took time training him on.

They’d been watching _101 Dalmatians_ because Dean thought it was hilarious how Sam would perk his ears and softly woof at the cartoon dogs. But when Pongo took it into his hands to find his owner a date Dean looked down at his furry goofball and had an idea. Sam seemed to know he was being manipulated because he rolled between Dean’s legs from his back to his belly and raised himself up to meet his owner’s green eyes.

Dean decided to call the command Operation Hookup.

And Sammy passed with flying colors, no doggie day camp, or piss poor vegan treats for you Buddy.

Any time Dean felt like getting some action they’d go to the dog park and Dean let Sam loose. The two would scope the place out and when Dean found a promising candidate he’d whisper “Operation Hookup,” and Sammy’d be off like a bolt. He’d run up to the woman and present his belly, yipping and being freaking adorable. And Dean had to admit, the dog knew how to turn the charm on.

Then it was for Dean to swoop in chat with the lady for a while and if it went off well…well that’s when Sammy got an extra pig’s ear and large rawhide bone.

Dean wasn’t proud he used his dog as a wingman but hey he wasn’t about to get serious with anyone and going to bars was out of the question so he relied on Sammy. It’s not like he took anyone against her will, and he made sure she was having a good time.

So, yeah, others might think Dean’s dog was morbid, but Dean truly believe in the whole “Man’s best friend” thing.

“Sammy,” Dean called when he got home from work on a Thursday night. Dean owned a coffee shop/bakery with his high school best friend Charlie and every other week they switched morning and night shifts. They had other workers and even a baker so neither had to go in at a time unholy to the rest of the world, but they were the bosses and they wanted one or the other to be there during business hours. “Sam,” Dean called again and shook the doggy bag. “Come on don’t be a pouter, Charlie made you a cookie.” He laughed when he heard paws skittering on the hardwood floor.

“You are such a drama queen,” Dean laughed harder when Sam came in but sat and looked at him, his eyes narrowed. He had his leash in his mouth and he looked pointedly at the door.

“What? Are you pouting because you want to go for a walk?” Sam huffed, “Do you want to go to the dog park?” A thump of a tail, and Dean did the math, they’d not been to the dog park in weeks because of the  hot as the devil’s balls weather and because the last time they were there (what a month and a half ago?) Dean had banged what’s-her-name and he wanted to give her space because he had had no intention of calling.

“Well it’s late, buddy, we’ll go on Saturday.” Sam huffed again but went to the small table by the door and dropped his leash. Dean rolled his eyes, the dog was _exactly_ like his brother. “Here are you going to eat this or is it mine?” Sam came up smiling and panting and looked at the treat bag.

“Hey we have to practice first,” Sam sat obediently and waited, “Up,” a look up, “Down,” at the floor, “High five,” a paw went up and smacked Dean’s outstretched palm, “Air guitar,” Sam went back on his haunches one arm outstretched while the other bent at his chest, “Soda,” the dog got up and Dean could hear him opening the fridge with a towel and seconds later the retriever came back with a dark bottle in his mouth. “Awesome,” Dean attacked his buddy with scratches and pats all over the ears. “You deserve this,” he opened the treat bag, “It’s your favorite, peanut butter.”

They spent the evening, like every night, on the couch watching cooking shows.

On Saturday morning Dean was awoken at ten with Sam shoving his cold nose on his feet. The dog had learned after a year of living with the man he was extremely sensitive on his feet and the best results were to press his cold nose right in the arch. The effect was immediate and Dean yelped and looked at his dog with his I’m-totally-innocent face on.

“You are such a little shit,” Sam just yawned loudly and looked on. “Fine, I’m getting up,” they both got up and Dean let Sam out to the backyard so he could do his business.

The trip to the dog park was uneventful and Dean promised himself he would take Sam there more often, the dog just looked so happy playing with other dogs or banging that damn Frisbee into Dean’s legs.

“Ok, Buddy time to go,” he clipped Sam’s leash on and they walked back home. Dean wasn’t in the mood for Operation Hookup, maybe next week.

They spent the night, again, on the couch watching the Food Network.

During the next week Dean was feeling a bit frisky. He knocked one or two out in the shower and maybe he was a bit of a dog himself, but going back to the dog park had got his mouth drooling and his ears perked. Maybe Operation Hookup might not be a bad idea, Dean enjoyed the idea of a one night stand.

So when Saturday rolled around, as soon as Dean got off work he woke a sleeping Sam and leashed him up.

It was Operation Hookup time.

They played Frisbee for a while, because come on Dean thought low enough of himself to use his dog as matchmaker but he’d be damned if he let his libido get in the way of Sammy’s play time. Besides the dog was his in anyway, he had to keep the fuzz ball happy or else those chocolate eyes wouldn’t turn on the cute.

“Ok Buddy,” he was on his knees and tugged at the Frisbee. Dean had been eyeing the park for a while now and found a nice blonde with huge tits. Perfect.

“Hey, gimme that,” he pulled the toy and Sam looked intently at him. Dean gave him the nod and the dog followed his eye line. “Operation Hookup,” Dean said firmly and Sam was off like a shot.

“No, shit, not that way,” Sam had veered off his course from the pretty blonde and had taken off to a grove of trees. Dean took off at a fast walk, Sam had pulled out all the stops on his running and was just a blur now.

“Damn, fucking dog,” Dean muttered. When he got to the grove of trees he still couldn’t see the little shit.

“Sam!” He called and whistled a few times. He kept walking and found his dear best friend.

Sam had his paws up on a bench and was enjoying being attacked by wide hands rubbing him all over. He was making happy noises as he licked all over the face he was blocking and his tail looked like it was going to wag right off his ass.

“Hey you troublemaker,” Dean pulled at his dog and saw the most beautiful blue eyes.

Sam had picked a man for Operation Hookup.

The man was laughing and was sexy as fuck with messy brown hair the color of Sam’s eyes and a two day stubble. He was wearing a blue button up under his blue sweater and dark jeans. A book was on the ground and Dean hastily picked it up.

“Sorry, he just sort of got away from me,” he handed the book off and the man beamed at him.

“That’s no problem, he was a gentleman.” Dean smiled and was about to say thanks when Sam came between them and dropped to the ground demanding a belly rub. He looked up with puppy eyes and Dean saw right through it. The stranger didn’t, he dropped to his knees and buried his fingers in Sam’s soft fur and the dog sighed happily. He looked up at Dean with a clear _this is how you should take care of me_ look and Dean just rolled his eyes.

“I’ll warn you he is a manipulator,” the man looked up continuing his belly rub and laughed.

“Oh I bet he’s just a sweetheart,” the deep voice that was doing several things to Dean cooed at his dog.

“Oh yeah, a real sweetheart,” Dean thought of the cold noses on his feet, the passive aggressive things Sam did like leave his leash lying around or managing to knock Dean’s soda over and then lapping it up, or eating all the toppings off the freaking pizza.  “I’m Dean,” he sat on the ground just so he could be in the eyesight of those sapphires.

“Castiel,” he man smiled and Sam feeling his work over, stretched and trotted off to find a stick. He brought one back and proceeded to gnaw on it while the two men sat on the ground.

“So where’s your dog?” Castiel looked sheepish and ducked his head.

“Um, the black Newfoundland over there,” he pointed at a huge black dog.

“That’s not a dog, that’s a bear,” Castiel laughed and Dean decided he liked that noise.

“She’s not really mine, she’s my brother’s but he doesn’t have the time to take care of her so I take her here every week to stretch her legs and play. My apartment doesn’t allow pets and I really love dogs.” Dean looked over at his plie of fur and smiled.

“Yeah, I can understand.”

“So how long have you had…”

“Sam? A year now, he was one when I got him from the shelter,” they looked at the goofball who had a stick between his paws and had rolled on to his back.

“Shelter, good for you,” there wasn’t any condensing tones in Cas’s voice it was praise all the way, “Is he a pure golden?”

“Well the shelter thinks that’s probably the base breed, but he might have some others in the mix.”

“Well he’s beautiful,” Cas sighed a little wistfully. “I really wish I could have a dog but I can’t move.” There was something behind that but Dean didn’t want to push.

“He likes you,” Dean laughed as Sam came back feeling himself being talked about and grabbed the Frisbee from Dean. He dropped it in Cas’s hands and took off before the thing was thrown.

Cas threw the neon yellow toy and Sam chased after it. He brought it back dutifully and Cas proceeded to throw it seven more times, the dog never tiring.

“I’ll tell you now, Cas, he doesn’t get tired.” The other man huffed a laugh.

“Cas, no one’s called me Cas, I like it,” he smiled at Dean and they stood in silence for a while more.

“Well I’m glad this was a bust,” Dean said after an hour of playing. Cas’s dog, Eliza, came over once she noticed a new dog and Dean and Cas had lounged on the bench watching the two play.

“What was?”

“I trained Sammy to help me pick up people,” Cas threw his head back and laughed.

“Who was he supposed to go after?” Dean looked around at the remaining people.

“Her,” he nodded and Cas made a face.

“Oh no not her, she has a Chihuahua.” Dean made a face too.

“I don’t like little dogs,” they both said at the same time and then they laughed.

“Well it doesn’t have to be…” Cas left the thought hanging.

“What?”

“A bust,” Cas looked at him in honest question. If Dean said no there would be no hard feelings.

“Hm, I’ll tell you Cas I haven’t been with a dude since I was in high school and then it wasn’t…”

“All the way?” How the hell could someone make those three words completely dirty and completely safe at the same time? There was no judgment in Cas’s question, but it sounded like the sexiest, fuckable question in the history of questions.

“Yeah, but um…” Dean let his eyes slowly rake over Cas’s body. The dude might be under layers but Dean wouldn’t mind peeling those layers back and seeing the present underneath. Cas leaned back and reveled in the inspection. “Yeah, why not, I can see having a lot of fun with you.” Cas smiled and _damn_ that had to be sexy too.

“I have to drop Eliza off at my brother’s but I can come to your place…” Dean jumped when a stray hand cupped him. “Finish what I started.”

“Uh, yeah, that sounds really good,” Dean nodded in case Cas didn’t understand the verbal yes.

“How about nine?”

“Great, really great,” Dean nodded again because that seemed to be all he knew what to do.

“And you live…”

“Oh!” Dean gave his address quickly and Cas quirked a smile.

“Can’t wait,” he breathed and leashed Eliza. Dean let out a breathy _fuck_ and watched that perfect ass sway away.

Sam sat next to him and waited patiently, when Dean finally woke up he clipped the leash onto the red collar, collected the Frisbee, brushed off his dog looking at him with the clear you’re-a-dumbass face, and walked them home quickly.

Cas had barely made it through the door before Dean was attacking him with his lips. He pushed the man up against the door and leaned heavily on him, licking every crevice in Cas’s mouth. The brunet seemed hella fine with Dean’s intrusion because he laced his hands around Dean’s wide back and fisted in his flannel trying to scrape at the skin underneath.

“I wish I had come sooner,” Cas panted as Dean pulled him by his belt through the house to his bedroom. “You’re dog isn’t like one of those watchers is he?”

“Nah, I put Scooby Doo on, he loves cartoons.” Cas couldn’t laugh as he was shoved roughly into the wall and his lips were attacked again. He moaned and this time his fingers fell further down to claw under Dean’s tee-shirt. The older man hoisted him up and Cas’s legs wrapped around Dean’s waist easily. His hands left Dean’s sides to run and grab at short hair and the kiss amped up to about a fifteen.

Dean finally got to his bedroom, _thank God_ he was worried they might be doing this on the stairs. He dropped Cas down on the bed and fell on top of the man. They laughed as they flopped around and lost themselves in the eagerness to get skin to skin close.

Dean swooped in for a kiss and he had forgotten how much _fun_ sex could be. His entire body felt alive as he kissed down Cas’s neck and the man rumbled a moan under him. Cas has found the hem of his shirt again, so while Dean was busy suckling at the hollow at the base of the man’s neck Cas was busy scratching at Dean’s muscles.

“Oh fuck,” Dean breathed, “You can take it off,” he sat back and started peeling layers off.

“Damn,” Cas breathed as Dean was shirtless, “Why do you bother with clothes?” Dean looked down at himself, yeah he had muscle but his tummy was soft and he didn’t have the abs he had when he was seventeen.

“Well let’s see if fabric is wasted on you,” Dean brushed off the compliment and started tugging at Cas’s shirt. The sweater went flying and the button up was opened tantalizingly slow and Dean’s mind stopped functioning when he saw a stud running through one of Cas’s dark nipples.

Dean let out a breathy, “ _Shit_ ,” and he spread his hands across Cas’s chest and stomach pushing the annoying fabric away.

“I got it on a dare,” Cas followed Dean’s eye line, “So is fabric wasted on me?” Cas looked coy and flirtatious.

“ _Damn_ never wear anything again.” Dean laughed and Cas matched it. It was clumsy and dark and more fun than either had had for a long time.

It got a bit more serious when Dean leaned in and rolled the stud around in his mouth. Cas keened and his back arched into the lips and his hands rubbed hard circles into Dean’s scalp. Dean smirked around the husky bud, he was going at a _mild_ pace at the most, how the hell was Cas going to react when he amped it up a bit?

Dean decided he very much wanted to find out.

They heard a distant woof in the house when Cas arched to the point where his back would break and screamed when Dean flicked the cold metal with his tongue. Fortunately Sam didn’t come and investigate, they had quieted and the dog felt he had done his duty and protected his house.

“Are you gonna come?” Dean smirked around the abused nipple and Cas panted. His chest was covered in sweat as he heaved.

“If you keep that up I will,” Dean licked a fat stripe being sure to push his tongue into the stud and Cas moaned again.

“Well I’d like to see that pretty cock of yours and it’d be a shame if the party ended early.” Dean rubbed Cas’s naked sides as the man’s breathing slowed and he could do the same. “Though I’d really like to see if I can get you to come just by sucking on that piercing,” Cas smiled, his eyes blowing black with lust.

“It’s happened before,” he said softly and Dean was too lost in his lust to ask questions.

“Well, damn, I’ll make sure it happens again.” Dean moved to Cas’s belt and opened it along with his jeans. He felt a pulsing heat as his fingers brushed the fabric behind the denim and Cas sucked in a breath. It wasn’t that Dean was searching Cas out in his pants, he was just damned determined to free his new lover and start riding him.

When Cas was free Dean could only stare. He wasn’t wide like Dean but he was long, like really long, like he was going to hit so many places in Dean the man was soaking his underwear at the thought. He placed a kiss at the curving tip and Cas started panting again.

It had been years, well over a decade since Dean gave a dude head but as soon as that cock was filling his mouth Dean tried very hard to remember why he stopped with dudes in the first place. Cas was writhing under him and Dean felt fantastic as his mouth and throat were full of musk and precum. He pulled off and lapped at the base and then took a ball in his mouth.

“Oh fuck,” Cas moaned, “This is going to end very soon if you keep doing that.” Dean popped off and shimmied off the bed so he could open his pants. “Are you sure you’ve never been with a man?” Cas stretched his naked form on the bed and relaxed his arms above his head.

“I’ve been with men, I just haven’t…”

“Gone all the way,” Cas smirked as he greedily raked in Dean’s now naked body.

“Well with a man, I have a vibrator…”

“A sight I’d very much like to see,” Cas said huskily, he tugged at Dean’s hips and pulled the man towards him until Dean was straddling him. “Do you have lube, condoms?” Dean nodded and got the items out of the nightstand. He set them next to Cas’s hip and then rolled himself to feel that glorious, _long_ cock in his cleft just to let Cas know how this was going to go down.

The man seemed to have no problems as he licked his lips and uncapped the lube bottle. He smeared his fingers and found his way back to Dean’s hole. Dean moaned at the aching burn as one finger slowly went into him and he fell forward on Cas’s wide chest. He groaned and sucked like mad on the tan skin as fingers inched into him making him feel complete and free.

When Cas had three fingers in him and was scissoring him open Dean knew the man was just going to keep going slow if he didn’t do anything. So he moved his heavy mouth back to the stud and played with it, hard. Cas yelled out and the fingers were gone in an instant. The sandy haired man smirked as he heard the fumbling of a wrapper being opened and then the condom being rolled on. He flicked the piercing again and he felt the blunt head of the cock he just had in his mouth nudging at him. He rolled the stud just a bit more as he felt Cas thrust up hard and bottom out.

They both froze for a moment, Dean reveled in how long Cas was and how he touched even deeper than Dean’s vibrator. He popped off the stud and moved to capture lips that hadn’t been kissed in a while.

They rolled around in one another’s mouths for a while, just frozen letting their bodies adjust. After a very good, wet kiss Dean started to tentatively rotate his hips and they both groaned. Dean sat back on his haunches and started to ride in earnest. He grabbed the toned thighs behind him and they sighed as the cock in him hit him perfectly. His cock stood away from his stomach, rock hard, and dripping on to Cas’s navel.

“Oh yes,” he moaned, this was a position he’d never been able to get with his vibrator and it was fucking perfect. Cas seemed to agree as he dug his nails into Dean’s hips and helped them find a rhythm.

They were soon a panting, cursing, sweating plie as Dean alternated between bouncing up and down and rolling his hips using Cas’s cock as a joystick. He rode and rode and reveled in the wide chest heaving under him. Cas looked absolutely debauched, and Dean felt oddly powerful that he’d done that. This was the moment in sex where Dean got off, he was making his partner feel so good and very soon he was going to get rewarded for that.

“Do you want to come?” Cas’s voice was four octaves lower and raspy.

“I could hold off for a bit.” Dean smirked which turned into a squeak as Cas sat up quickly and pushed Dean on his back. The brunet grabbed both of the man’s thighs and opened Dean’s legs further than the man thought possible. He started thrusting and Dean could only moan and hang on to the footboard as he lost himself in the beauties of the new position. He loved the sound of Cas’s balls slapping his ass and Cas cursing nonstop in time with the snap of his hips.

“Oh, fuck Cas,” Dean moaned and Cas dropped his legs and fell down to kiss hard. He still kept thrusting at his fast pace but Dean’s legs were able to wrap around his back and Cas in turn gripped Dean’s arms leading them around his shoulders.

With Dean’s shaft caught between them his orgasm was building much faster than the last position. He groaned around Cas’s tongue and bit at his lower lip. Cas nodded into the kiss and jerked his hips deep and hard. Dean moaned loud enough to shake the walls as he came between them. Cas rode him though it and continued to thrust keeping that golden feeling high in Dean.

Dean knew Cas was close so he continued to kiss hard and his hand snaked down for a third time to abuse the studded nipple. Cas screamed in his mouth and Dean felt the cock shudder and the condom get hot. Cas thrust three or four more times with no rhythm to speak of and then collapsed on Dean’s chest. He gently pulled out and rolled over so they could lay side by side on their backs catching their breaths.

“Well I have to say, that was better than a vibrator.” Dean laughed and Cas matched it. The brunet peeled the condom off and tied it, Dean went into action mode and took the latex to the bathroom and brought out a wet cloth. He wiped his stomach and cock and then handed it to Cas. The other man cleaned up and when Dean came out of the bathroom after depositing the used cloth Cas was already half dressed.

“Do you want coffee or food or anything?”

“Nah,” Cas didn’t bother buttoning up his shirt or tucking it in, he just pulled his sweater on. Dean thought it would be polite if he didn’t sit in his naked glory so he got dressed in sweats and a tee-shirt. “I should get home.” Cas ran a hand through his hair, patted himself down checking to see if he’d forgotten anything. It wasn’t as if he were actively _not_ looking at Dean, but he wasn’t actively looking at Dean either. “Thanks,” Cas finally looked up and held out his hand. “This was fun.” Dean smiled and shook his outstretched hand. He led them through the house and paused at the front door.

“I had a good time, Cas,” Sam had made an appearance and was enjoying a good back scratch.

“Me too,” Cas straightened and opened the door. There was no “We should do this again,” or “See you around,” Cas just waved and walked away.

“Sammy,” Dean called as his dog tried to follow the man. The furry monster trotted back to the house and looked at Dean like he was a total idiot.

“What? We’ve done Operation Hookup before,” Dean crossed his arms as Sam’s chocolate eyes bored into him. “You have never had any issues with my fucks in the past, what now?” Sam just yawned and grunted. He padded through the house and Dean heard him lapping up some water.

***

Over the next few weeks Dean convinced himself he was fine. And he was, Cas was a fantastic fuck and had provided a _huge_ deposit in the spank bank so Dean was fine.

He just wished he could convince his fucking dog.

When Dean got home Sammy would wait at the door, not for long, just looking hopefully as if someone were coming in just behind his owner. Then it was his freaking leash. Dean found the damn thing everywhere, the shower, his chair at the dinner table, the couch, on top the toilet, the best (where he had to just laugh and look at his passive aggressive dog who was sitting next to him but chose at that moment to look out the window) was in the fridge. Damn that dog was smart.

Dean tried to trick him into going to different parks, and while Sam played Frisbee and wrestled and had a great time he still knew.

And Dean found his freaking leash on his pillow.

It wasn’t as if Dean were avoiding the dog park for a reason. First he was swamped with work. Their espresso machine decided to join its brothers and sisters in coffee heaven and so Dean had to drive eight hours to a large town to replace it. Then it took four days to install and learn the damn thing then train everyone else.

Then the baker quit, something about following his dreams on Broadway, so Dean (being the better baker of the two because come on Charlie muffins aren’t supposed to cave into themselves and no we can’t say it’s a special feature) had to get up at three fucking a.m. to cover.

So five weeks later they still hadn’t found a baker and Dean had been going in early every morning and coming home to find Sammy’s leash in the kitchen sink.

“Fine, I will take you!” Dean snapped and Sam just smiled at him. He filled the biggest mug he could find with coffee and his damn dog dragged him to the damn park.

If Dean had been avoiding, which he totally wasn’t, it wouldn’t have mattered. The second Sam was off his leash he was off like a streak to the benches in the alcove of trees. But Cas wasn’t there.

Dean could tell his best friend’s enthusiasm had taken a puncture but the dog still played and Dean sipped his coffee, grateful for the warmth and caffeine. The weather was getting colder as October was coming to a close and Dean remembered he was going to have to shift around schedules at the coffee shop for Halloween. That was the nice thing about working in a homey town, it wasn’t small but it had this awesome small town feel and on Halloween all the stores opened their doors and let kids come in for trick-or-treating.

Last year they’d had far too many people working, Dean had scheduled everyone and really they just needed three. Sam trotted up to him and flopped down with a sigh.

“Hey how about Operation Hookup?” Dean teased and Sam threw a bitch face at him. “Ok how about you be our mascot for Halloween?” Sam decided he liked that better and got up to nuzzle all over Dean’s face.

***

“Hey come on you said you would be the mascot,” Dean laughed as Sam glared at him. Dean had found a lion hood and Sammy looked like a little Simba and Dean had found some khakis and he was a lion tamer. “Hey cut that out,” Dean said firmly as Sam pawed at the hood. “It’s for the kids, man, don’t be a pouter.” Sam made a growl in the back of his throat. “Dude, I’ll give you free samples.” Sam seemed to like that very much and licked Dean’s hand. “Ok come on Simba.”

Sammy was a huge success. The kids adored him and he gorged himself on pats and coos, and the kids going nuts over him.

“Bye-Bye Simba,” a five year old waved and Sam just looked over at Dean all superior. It was just them in the store since Dean sent the others home. Charlie had a niece who wanted to show off her costume and their other barista had been in all day. Dean didn’t mind, he had his friend with him and Sammy was more than enjoying himself.

At about five minutes to close Dean was done wiping tables and everything behind the counter gleamed. The kids had trickled down to nothing an hour ago and Dean was ready to go home. They’d tried a new baker out but she was rubbish and cracked under the pressure, so Dean thanked whoever that at least tomorrow the café was closed and he got to sleep in.

“Ok buddy are you ready to take that thing off?” Sam looked at him and ran away and Dean guffawed. He moved behind the counter to lock up the back and make sure all the machines were unplugged. He chatted to his dog the entire time, “Oh I see, you bitched about it ever since I brought it home last week and now because you got all the damn attention you don’t want to take it off. I’m just going to tell you now I better not find this in my underwear drawer like I found your leash.” He walked out to the café and found a man kneeling on the floor and Sam enjoying a belly rub.

“I thought I recognized him,” Cas stood and smiled. “Cute costume,” Sam grunted, “Oh I’m sorry, manly, very terrifying.” Sam played and wiggled under Cas’s hands as Dean laughed. “Hello, Dean,” Cas straightened and held his hand out.

“Hey Cas, how’ve you been?”

“Good, I’ve been out of town for a week on business and my sleep schedule still appears to be off…” he looked out at the darkened sky.

“Really?” Dean moved around the counter and leaned against it with his legs slightly open. “So what are you going to do when you should be sleeping?” Cas quirked an eyebrow and stalked up to Dean like he was his prey.

“You, if you’re free.” Dean’s face broke into a smile.

“Oh, hell yes, but we should go to my place, unless yours is closer…” Cas shook his head.

“Yours,” Dean flicked the lights, clipped Sam on his leash, and locked the café up.

“Here this one’s mine,” they followed Sam to the Impala and the dog got in to the backseat easily. His tail was wagging and he was giving that golden retriever smile at both men. Dean whacked him in the face and took the lion’s hood off.

“This is a gorgeous car,” Cas murmured as he settled into the bench seat.

“Now see you can’t say that,” Dean laughed as he started the car.

“Why not?”

“Because it makes me want to do this,” Dean leaned in and captured Cas’s tongue in his mouth. He griped the back of Cas’s head and pushed their faces together hard.

“Mmmm,” Cas licked his lips after they broke apart, “I think this is a gorgeous fucking car.” Dean laughed and rubbed Cas’s legs. He drove back quickly to his house and the moment the door was closed behind them they were tangled together.

Cas laid his entire length across Dean as they tongue fucked the other’s mouth. Dean buried his fingers in Cas’s messy hair and Cas scrambled to get Dean’s jacket and khaki shirt off. He started biting at Dean’s exposed neck while the man moaned and moved down to fill his hands with ass. Dean roughly grabbed at the jeaned flesh and they started grinding. Cas’s breath was hot and heavy on Dean’s neck as he paused for a moment curled into the wide chest.

He did reach up and reclaim Dean’s lips until the man knew they’d be bruised. They moaned and shouted in their shared mouth as Cas started humping faster and Dean fell his head back with a thunk on the wall. The friction was fucking awesome and he could feel the entire outline of Cas’s fantastic cock against his.

“I’m not going to make it upstairs,” Dean whispered and Cas nodded. They stayed glued together as they moved through the house, kissing hard every foot and leaning into any wall they could, until Dean could get them to the couch.

“Dog?” Cas said harshly.

“He won’t bug us,” Cas looked curious at Dean’s assured tone. “His blanket is gone, that means he’s nestled somewhere, probably my bed, and is in for the night.”

“He has his own blanket?” Cas forgot their lust for a moment and giggled.

“Yeah, he um found it when I first brought him here…” Dean didn’t want to say specifically where Sammy had found his blanket or who the previous owner was. “And when it gets cold he drags that thing around wherever he decides he’s going to nap.” 

“Smart dog,” Cas mused.

“Yeah I’m pretty sure he’s too smart for his own good.” Dean took his shirt off and dropped back on the couch. Cas yanked his jacket and sweater off and opened his belt and jeans. He did the same on Dean and then draped himself on the couch over the man.

They made out and Dean left some very good scratches between Cas’s shoulder blades while Cas continued to roll their hips together. His tongue in Dean’s mouth was heavy and tasted slightly of whisky and got Dean drunk in all kinds of ways. He unhinged his jaw to take more of the man in as he forced his hand away from the tan skin of shoulder to sneak under the open jeans to Cas’s ass.

Cas moaned into his mouth and pressed himself harder into everything of Dean. The sandy haired man in return wrapped his jeaned legs around Cas’s waist and their kiss went from hot and full of desire to holy fuck this was what kissing was created for. They were frantic and desperate and the room was filled with needy sounds from the back of their throats. Cas started thrusting his crotch in earnest against Dean’s and Dean threw his head back and moaned.

He woke when Cas pulled back a bit and whipped himself out. When he moved to Dean there was no preamble, he just reached in and suddenly Dean was bouncing and gloriously free.

His desire amped up to about a hundred and fifty when Cas spit in his palm and pulled both of them in his hand. Getting a feel for it Cas moved his hips slowly and Dean’s eyes rolled back, the feel of Cas’s cock with his, the feel of Cas’s hand on him…it was all a prefect recipe to get Dean Winchester to lose his fucking mind.

Once they were slotted together to Cas’s standard the man put a hand on the back of the couch for balance and went to town. Dean choked in the back of his throat and added his hand to the mix around Cas’s to make a perfect tunnel to thrust into.

When he rolled his head he bared his neck and Cas targeted in. He bit and sucked and Dean could only cry out as Cas growled.

Dean had just enough of his mind power to remember the cool piercing between them and with his free hand Dean moved to play with it. Cas jerked in his hand and on his mouth as Dean’s stomach was covered in warmth.

After his mind cleared Cas knocked Dean’s hand away and started to furiously get him off. He pushed his thumb into Dean’s slit and the man came, swearing, all over him. Cas sat back on his haunches, panting and watching Dean regain his mind.

“I should get home,” he said quietly.

“Well let me get you a towel first,” Dean untangled himself and made his way to the kitchen. Cas was still on the couch looking at his hands when Dean handed the wet cloth over. They cleaned up quickly and tucked themselves away after dressing.

“I have to say, man, I’m a bit disappointed when you said you were going to do me,” Dean threw a lazy smile over, “This was awesome, don’t get me wrong, but I was hoping for more naked, naked time…” He was giving Cas a chance, there was no hint of promise in his voice, if Cas wanted to fuck again that was fine with Dean. If he didn’t…well it was still fine with Dean but he would be disappointed.

“I should get home…” Cas sounded like he too had wanted naked, naked time.

“Ok, Cas let me drive you.” Cas’s eyes went wide and he shook his head.

“No. No I can’t have you drive me,” he paused realizing how he sounded and pulled himself back. “I mean thank you for the offer but I’m fine.”

“Well at least let me drive you to the café.” Cas narrowed his eyes but finally nodded.

The drive was silent as they went along. Dean got the distinct impression Cas did not want to speak and he didn’t want to push the dude. Really he’d just asked if they could be fuck buddies and Cas was probably pissed that Dean didn’t want him more than that. Wait would Cas want more than being fuck buddies? Dean couldn’t ignore the leap of hope in his chest.

“Dean there’s the café.”

“Right,” Dean slowed and pulled in front of his café. “Sorry, I guess I come here practically every day that I kind of zone out when I drive here.” Cas just hummed to show he heard and slid out as soon as the car stopped.

“I had fun, thank you Dean,” and with that he was gone.

Cas was freezing when he got into his dark apartment. It was three stories up and small and the building was extremely run down. The door was stuck in the jamb again but he was able to kick and shoulder his way in.

“Honey I’m home,” he called in the dark apartment. “I met that man again,” he said as he walked around boxes through to the kitchen. He washed his hands and got a glass of water. “I didn’t have sex, I wanted to, but I didn’t. He works at that café on Main. His dog is really adorable and smart. I’ve never met a dog that smart. And he talks to it like he’s a person.” Cas walked through and got into the bedroom. He set his water glass down. He snuggled down in bed and wrapped his arms around his boyfriend’s pillow.

Yes, Cas knew Bal was gone. Yes, he saw the casket lowered into the ground. Yes, he knew he was talking to no one but a pillow. But he couldn’t seem to stop. As if talking to the pillow kept his boyfriend’s memory alive. And if he stopped then Bal would be gone forever.

“I really want to have sex with him again.” He murmured, “I know, I know, I won’t date him, you’re the only one I’m going to love, but I wouldn’t mind fucking him again. Is that ok?” the empty apartment was silent and Cas sighed.

He really hated being alone.

***

“Dude keep it together,” Dean laughed as Sam nearly knocked him over, again. “Calm down,” Sam’s tail was threatening to fall off as he woofed and ran all over the house. Dean couldn’t stop laughing hearing his paws skittering on the hardwood floors as Sam would pause at a window and then run off whining and barking.

“Dude!” Dean called and the dog settled. He sat himself in front of the window and looked everywhere, his ears cocked and squeaks and whines coming up. “Do you want to go to the dog park?” Dean asked slyly and Sam was off. The man couldn’t get his dog leash on because the golden was running all over the house yipping and nearly sliding into walls.

“Sammy!” Dean used his big brother voice and the dog calmed. He pulled his jacket and hat on and clipped Sam to his leash.

See Dean liked snow, he liked the way it came down, he liked the look of it outside the windows, and he liked having a white Christmas.

Sammy freaking _loved_ snow.

Last year Dean watched his one year old puppy slide into walls and going crazy at the sight of the white fluffs coming down. Now again Dean could only watch in amazement as his goofball golden retriever jumped and skipped and tried to chase the flakes coming down.

There was no one else at the dog park when Dean let Sam go off his leash. The dog didn’t know where to go first as he just stood transfixed looking around his upper lip stuck in his teeth and his ears cocked. He was so into the snow he didn’t notice Dean picking some up and throwing it at his face. He barked joyfully and ran around Dean’s legs trying to get his master as excited as he was about the white stuff coming down.

They played and threw Frisbee for a while before Dean noticed they weren’t the only ones at the park. A dark, lumbering shape bundled up to them and Sam went into sniff mode. When the dog passed standard the two ran off to play. Dean blew into his hands and pulled his cap down over his ears.

“Eliza!” A deep voice called and Dean looked up to the man he’d been thinking about for a month and half.

“Cas!” He smiled and the other man broke into a beam too.

“Dean! I thought we’d be the only ones here.”

“Oh no, Sammy is obsessed with snow,” the looked over to see the golden rolling in a snowbank. It had been snowing all night and on the first morning Dean hadn’t had to go in early (the new baker Benny was turning out to be really great) he was woken with a cold nose on his feet at eight in the morning and his goofball dog running around the house losing his mind at the sight of snow. “I got him right before the first snowfall last year and I called the vet in a panic when he started going crazy looking out the window.” Cas laughed.

“What’s he like in a blizzard?”

“A fucking nightmare,” Cas laughed harder and Dean joined him. “He won’t decide what window to watch out of, and then he has to drag me all over the house because I just have to witness how fantastic it is with him. Then he’ll just fall over and lay on the floor as if it’s all too much for him to handle. He gets so bad I have to wear my shoes to bed.” Cas looked in confusion and Dean elaborated. “He sticks his nose on my feet to wake me up.”

“That dog is really too smart,” Cas mused and Dean looked over at his dork of a best friend. Sam’s face was covered in snow, because he liked to shove his face in snowbanks (didn’t everyone?) and his face was the picture of joy as he looked over at Dean.

“So what about you? Eliza a fan of the snow?”

“Well I think she’s a fan of weather that doesn’t make her feel like she’s roasting. But I am doing my brother a favor, he’s away on business so I’m making sure Eliza’s being taken care of.”

“You’re a good brother,” Dean had to look at his dog before his eyes misted. Sam seemed to sense his distress and was over in a second with his Frisbee and barking around the toy. He shoved it in Dean’s fingers and the man was calmed watching the red fur running back and forth. Dean forgot the man next to him as Sammy helped him through his panic attack.

“I should…” Cas’s voice died. Dean was going through some kind of emotion and Cas knew he was probably the cause. He hurt everyone around him, why would he be surprised he was hurting Dean too?

“Can we fuck?” Dean’s voice was small and harsh.

“Is that a good…” Cas’s voice was cut off by Dean’s tongue.

“I don’t care.” Dean mouthed at him. They got to Dean’s car and used the lube in the glovebox to get Dean open and ready in the back seat.

“I’m clean,” Dean nodded.

“Me too,” Cas didn’t want to talk about dead boyfriends so he swiped down and thrust in. It was quick, dirty, and completely satisfying.

Dean was used to Cas’s brush offs and it wasn’t any different this time. As soon as they were dressed Cas called for Eliza and had her leashed and out of the park by the time Dean had made it out of his car.

***

Dean thought he wouldn’t see Cas again for at least a month. They’d met three times and a month and a half was the average time between.

So when the man with the mussed up hair entered the coffee shop two days later Dean felt like Sammy seeing snow.

“Hey, Cas, what can I get you?”

“Um the peppermint mocha latte? And a white chocolate scone.” Dean smiled and started the order.

“Both great choices,” he continued to smile like an idiot, “I wish we could serve the peppermint latte all year but the owner won’t let me.” Charlie threw him the finger under the counter and he stuck his tongue out.

“Dean this total is less than the board,” Cas narrowed his eyes at the total and then up on the board.

“Yeah I used my friends and family discount.”

“I’m not…”

“I know,” Dean scrubbed the back of his neck, “But I’ve never gotten to use it before.” Cas opened and shut his mouth before sliding the appropriate cash over the counter. He looked so freaking adorable that Dean just had to reward him.

So he blew Cas in the bathroom.

“I don’t want to get to know him,” Cas whispered to Bal’s pillow that night. “But I can’t help it, I want to ask him so many questions.” Cas held the pillow tighter, he wanted to know why Dean had never used his friends and family discount. He wanted to know why Dean chose the smaller of the bedrooms for his room, he wanted to know why the decorations were nice but old all over Dean’s house. He wanted to know why there were no pictures.

“But I’m not going to get to know him.” Cas whispered firmly.

Despite Cas’s promise to himself they kept meeting after that. Cas would come into the coffee shop and they’d blow each other in the bathroom, or Cas would stay to the end of Dean’s shift and they’d go to Dean’s home and fuck.

It was nothing more than casual and as soon as the cum was cleaned away Cas was gone.

“You doing anything for New Years?” Dean panted as he sat in Cas’s lap and bounced up and down.

“No,” Cas said firmly and he thrust up he bit down on Dean’s lips and the man fell silent. He realized Cas hated talking during sex except for curses. He hated it even more when Dean called his name out and he despised eye contact.

They finished shortly after and Cas peeled himself off the bed and made his way to the bathroom. He’d long ago learned Dean’s house and the man seemed comfortable letting him walk around.

“So you want to hang out?”

“When?”

“New Years.”

“No.”

“Oh,” Cas hated himself for causing that crestfallen look on Dean’s face.

“No, it’s not that it’s just…I can’t…” he looked down. “I can’t be involved with anyone.”

“I’m not asking to get involved, Cas, I was just asking if you wanted to hang out.” Cas thought to his planned lonely night in. He would probably fall asleep on his couch with Bal’s pillow. “Come on, Sammy will be over the moon.” Cas nodded slightly and Dean’s face broke into a beam.

***

“It’s not a date,” Cas said as he stood in his bedroom and looked at his collection of sweaters. “It’s not,” he insisted. “I’m going to hang out with him. Hanging out does not make it a date. There will be no kissing at midnight. Kissing at midnight is for couples and dates. There will be no kissing at midnight.” He held up a green sweater, that one matched Dean’s eyes or a hazel one that reminded him of Bal.

He went with hazel.

“Hey, dude, which one?” Dean held up two Henley’s and looked at Sam who was lounging on his bed. The dog panted and blinked at him. “You are no help whatsoever.” Sam just gave a soft woof and Dean didn’t have the time to choose between plaids because he could hear the doorbell ringing.

Sam was off the bed in a shot and making happy barks through the house. Dean rolled his eyes and threw a green plaid shirt over his black shirt.

“Hey,” Dean opened the door and had to shove his excited puppy back with his knee. Sam just seemed to _know_ this was different and as soon as Cas was inside the dog took him by the pant leg and toured him around the house.

“Dude, cut it out,” Dean laughed. He had taken the bag out of Cas’s hands and laughed at his over excited dog. “Sammy!” he said loudly when the dog started to squeak. “Get Cas a soda,” the retriever was off like a shot and they heard him fumbling in the kitchen. Seconds later he had an amber bottle of root beer in his mouth and he passed it off to Cas looking proud.

“That’s an amazing trick.” Cas smiled and Dean looked proudly at his dog.

“That’s nothing, Sam give Cas a high five,” the dog did so. “Air guitar,” Cas almost dropped his bottle in laughter. “Head bang,” Sam kept his paws up but tilted his head up and down panting and smiling. He was the center of attention and he loved it.

“That’s awesome,” Cas laughed and wiped his eyes. He held his hand out for the bag and pulled out chips, dip, and brownies. “I didn’t know what to bring,” he said sheepishly and the good humor was ebbing away.

“Nah that’s fine,” Dean clapped him on the shoulder and Cas followed him back to the kitchen. There were three steaks on the counter and a pecan pie. “I hope you don’t mind meat, I guess I should have asked if you were a vegan or something.” Cas shook his head.

“Three?”

“It’s a family tradition,” Dean said and Cas got the impression it was a tradition long before Sam was adopted. “Hey these chips will be good as these steaks grill.” Dean grinned, “Do you want something different to drink? We’re working on Sprite vs. root beer but all he knows right now is soda.” As if on cue the fridge opened behind them and a cold bottle was pressed into Dean’s leg.

“Do you have anything stronger?” Cas didn’t _need_ a drink but alcohol would help.

“Oh, um,” Dean played with the label on his soda. “No, I, um, don’t drink at all. My dad died eleven years ago in a drunk driving accident.”

“Oh,” Cas said softly, “Was he…”

“Yeah he was the drunk one, he took out another car,” Dean looked at his palms. “The other two, a mom and daughter, they’re fine, but the mom was in a coma for a while and the daughter lost both her legs.” Dean’s face flinched and he grabbed the steaks to take them outside. Cas ran a hand over his eyes and Sam sighed deeply. The dog watched the door and when he heard Dean coming back he wagged his tail and for the second time Cas watched the retriever calm and take care of his master.

“So my brother is a writer and he got Eliza three years ago and when she was a puppy she stretched all his shoes out by sticking her face in them.” Cas talked quickly and he didn’t know why he was speaking. But he felt oddly good when Dean laughed and his tension seemed to be eased. “How are you training different sodas?”

“Um, light and dark, we might make it to the difference between coke and root beer he catches on quick when he feels like it.” They both looked down at the dog laying at their feet. They seemed to be at a loss of what to do when they weren’t fucking.

“Do you have any movies?”

After they got over their awkwardness the night was actually kind of awesome. Cas opened up and talked about his work, he was a writer for a literary magazine reviewing new books, they talked about music, books, movies, Sam, Eliza, everything that wasn’t too personal.

Around eleven they had somehow tangled on the couch with Sam heavy on their legs and were kissing. It was light, feather kisses, slowly opening up to heavier more open mouths. Touches lingered and it felt like they’d lived together for years and knew everything about the other’s soul. They were quiet and Dean cradled Cas while the other man rubbed his back. Dean had put the ball drop on and Cas was awoken roughly as he heard the countdown.

“No, no, no, no, no, no, no, I can’t, no kissing at midnight.” Before Dean could even comprehend Cas had stumbled out of his arms grabbed his jacket and boots and was gone.

“Don’t look at me,” Dean looked down at his glaring dog who had been awoken from a fantastic dream of chasing squirrels. “I was a fucking gentleman.” Sam huffed telling Dean he didn’t believe him and got off the couch, he stretched, grabbed his blanket and walked off.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Cas sobbed into his pillow. “I’m so sorry I’m never leaving you.” He rubbed his face in the soft fabric and fell into a black sleep.

***

It was past Valentine’s day when Dean saw Cas again. The man walked in to get coffee and Dean was on him in a second. He pulled Cas to the back room and smacked away the hand quickly reaching into his belt.

“Where have you been?”

“What?”

“You ran away from my house in your socks and you’ve been avoiding me.” Cas looked down guiltily. He couldn’t deny that he was avoiding the café. At first it was to play with Dean but then he realized he really loved the bakery items and Dean made a really good cup of coffee and Cas found himself bringing his work there and getting a lot done.

“I…” Cas’s voice died as he looked into hard green eyes. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled, “I don’t know how…I don’t want a relationship.”

“Ok…” Dean crossed his arms.

“I like you,” Cas whispered softly, “But I _can’t,_ I have….my…I like you, but I can’t.” He couldn’t look at Dean.

“Ok,” Dean was softer and Cas looked up in surprise. “Ok, you’re entitled. But I’m entitled to a fucking conversation not you practically throwing me off the couch and running out the door. I’m not going to push you or force you into something you don’t want but I don’t deserve to be thrown away.” Cas nodded.

“That’s fair,” they both stood in awkward silence for a moment.

“So…”

“So…” Cas looked up, “Do you still want to fuck?”

“Oh hell yes,” Dean breathed and surged forward capturing Cas’s lips like they belonged to him. They moved quickly and breathily and ended with Dean bent over and Cas finishing inside him.

“The owner is going to be pissed,” Cas whispered as he tucked himself back in and zipped up.

“I doubt it,” Dean laughed he found a spare rag and cleaned himself up. “I’m the owner.”

“What?” Dean laughed at Cas’s bug eyes. “Does that mean I can still get a peppermint mocha latte?” Dean laughed again and nodded.

“Only because you know just how to fuck my brains out.”

They fell into a rhythm after that. They fucked and Dean never asked Cas for anything. Once he knew Dean wasn’t going to ask for a relationship Cas felt a bit more comfortable with him. He still never stayed after sex, but hearing Dean’s soft “See you later,” at the door didn’t freak him out.

Then came the night that Dean did ask for something.

“You want to what?”

“Fuck,” Dean kissed Cas’s naked chest and ended on his favorite piece of jewelry ever. “You.” Cas shivered and ran a hand through spikey hair, “I want,” Dean breathed and kissed all over, Cas hated hickies and marks, “To bend you over,” he lapped at a panting neck, “And fuck into you.”

“Ohhh,” Cas tilted his head back and turned to lay on his stomach. Over the months Dean had learned what Cas had liked and slow and tender was not something Cas liked. He ran his hands on the back and moved down to Cas’s ass. Cas moved so he could kneel and open himself up. Dean slicked his finger up and started working Cas open and enjoyed just watching the perfect image of man he…liked? Liked. eating his fingers up eagerly.

When he got three fingers in Dean moved slightly to find Cas’s mouth and fuck into him with his tongue like his fingers. They made out as Dean rubbed the silky skin of Cas.

“Are you ready?” Cas nodded and Dean moved them again. He sat up and pulled Cas back so the man’s back could fuse with Dean’s chest. Cas guided him and Dean was a mess of curses as he licked Cas’s shoulder and bottomed out.

“I forgot what this feels like,” Cas whispered and Dean nodded. He wrapped his hands around Cas’s chest and buried himself in the man’s neck.

Cas rose and fell and somehow instantly Dean was able to match with the perfect rhythm of thrusting up. They lost themselves as they sweated and rutted together. Dean’s hand found Cas’s cock after a while and the man was groaning and rolling his head on Dean’s shoulder as a hand jerked him off and fingers flicked his nipple stud.

“Oh fuck, harder,” Cas begged as his hips thrust into a palm and chest arched into teasing fingers.

Dean obliged and pushed Cas to his hands and knees as he started pounding in. Cas had to grab his cock and stroke himself off as Dean held his hips and threw his head back in the superb feeling of Cas around his cock.

“Oh, oh, oh, ohhhhhh,” Cas blacked out as he covered the sheets and then as soon as he came too he blacked out again as he felt Dean filling him. He collapsed on the bed and this time Dean didn’t get up. They both fell instantly asleep with Dean’s arm around Cas’s lower back.

***

Cas woke up to someone kissing his back. He felt a heavy weight on his feet and the lips following his spine were incredibly pleasant.

“Hey,” Dean whispered, “Do you want coffee? Breakfast?”

“What?” Cas’s head popped up and Dean thought his bed hair was adorable. “What time is it?”

“Around nine,” Dean smiled his arm still heavy on Cas’s back. A sheet covered them from the waist down and Sam was deep asleep on his back on their legs. Domesticity in a picture.

“I can’t keep doing this,” Cas scrubbed his face. This was the first night he’d been away from home since Bal died. His first instinct was to run home and hug Bal’s pillow and apologize for forgetting his boyfriend.

“Keep doing what?” Why did Dean have to keep his arm on him?

“Seeing you,” Cas sighed, he sat up and Dean just rolled over on his side. “I’m starting to feel things for you, and I can’t…” he closed his eyes. He didn’t want to see the beautiful man with the beautiful dog and the beautiful bed. “I have…I can’t fall in love.” He got up quickly and started to get dressed.

Dean didn’t follow him to the door, didn’t wave goodbye, didn’t say he’d see Cas soon.

***

After five months Dean became convinced Cas wasn’t coming back. Cas wouldn’t come for a relationship but he wasn’t coming for a fuck either.

Sam still stubbornly held the faith.

He sat at the door for at least half an hour every time Dean came home. He carried his leash everywhere until Dean finally just snapped.

“He’s not coming Sam, so cut it out!” The dog looked over his shoulder still facing the front door. “He doesn’t want us Buddy,” Dean rubbed his eyes and Sam sighed. The man jumped when a wet nose nudged at his hand and a tentative smile looked up at him. “I’m sorry, Buddy,” Dean dropped to his knees and buried his face in reddish fur. Sam rested his head on Dean’s shoulder and sighed as the man cried softly into his shoulder.

So many people left Dean, his entire family, his uncle Bobby, his girlfriend Lisa, everyone left him. And now Cas was gone too. Sammy was the only one who stayed constant in Dean’s life and he held onto the dog with all his power.

Another month passed and Dean was feeling better. Sam seemed to understand why they didn’t go to the dog park anymore and didn’t bug Dean too much about it. Dean also started tentatively dating their baker Benny. He knew it was a dumb idea to date anyone he worked with but Benny was hot and kind and funny.

Sam liked him, he didn’t go crazy with joy and he had no interest in showing off and Dean noticed when Benny spent the night Sam slept on the couch or his giant bean bag downstairs. Benny noticed too and in an effort to bond with the dog took him to the dog park.

Dean found the note when he got home and sighed. He wanted it to be easy between them but after only a few days of trading keys he was irked that Benny had just taken his dog with no thought of asking Dean.

He followed the walk that he couldn’t stop thinking about for months. The sounds of dogs barking and yipping got louder and Dean scanned the large fenced in area. He wasn’t looking for red fur, but rather a hulking black dog.

“Hey you got my note,” Benny smiled at the offered cup of coffee. He kissed Dean out of habit and that’s when Dean saw Eliza. More specifically Eliza being led away by Cas. Sam was bouncing behind the man with a tennis ball in his mouth and Dean froze as Benny was talking when Cas looked in his direction. Castiel looked away quickly and Sam sat at the entrance watching him go.

“Did you hear me?”

“What?”

“I asked what your family is doing for Labor Day.”

“Oh um, I think going to the lake.” Dean felt his heart crack a little bit as he watched his best friend just sit obediently waiting at the entrance.

“We could go,” Benny looked at him, “I’d like to meet them.” Dean had never mentioned his lack of family and he had liked the rebirth of not being alone in someone’s eyes. Everyone always changed when they heard of Dean’s past and he kind of liked the way Benny looked at him without that knowledge.

Then again Dean had been stuck making Benny think he didn’t want to introduce the man to his family. Benny was from a large family that Dean had met and now the man had been pressuring Dean into introducing him.

“Ummm,” Dean kept glancing over and seeing Sam still in the same place.

“Damn it Dean I’m tired of being hidden away,” that got Dean to look away from his dog and at Benny.

“What?”

“You’re clearly embarrassed by me and I’m tired of it!”

“I’m not embarrassed,” Dean said tiredly.

“Yes you are!”

“No,” Dean looked hard in blue eyes that were so different from Cas’s. “I’m not.”

“Whatever, you know I can’t do this anymore.”

“Ok,” Dean said tiredly. “You can go back to my house and get your stuff, leave your key under the mat.”

“How can you be so calm about this?!”

“You say I’m embarrassed, I’m not. You say you can’t stay, I’m not going to force you.” Benny made a face of pure anger and stalked off. Dean slid down to a bench and after a minute a cold nose was pushing at his face.

“Hey Buddy,” Dean was tired and Sam seemed the same. He dropped the tennis ball Benny had brought and didn’t fight the dog who took it from him. If it had been his Frisbee…

“Let’s go for a walk.” Dean didn’t know how long it would take Benny to get his stuff, not long, they’d only exchanged keys four days ago, but he still wanted to give the man more than enough time. And he didn’t want to stay at the dog park looking for a bear of a dog that wouldn’t be there.

Dean threw himself into his work. He had to talk to Charlie and explain the situation and she was the perfect mediator between him and Benny. Dean was switched to afternoons and nights so he wouldn’t have to see much of Benny.

Then a month after they broke up Charlie came down with the flu and Dean had to open with Benny.

“Hey,” Benny thinned his mouth. “My family is all dead, ok?” Dean bit out. “I have Charlie and she already knows you. If I had anyone I wouldn’t be embarrassed to introduce you.” Benny worked his jaw.

“Would you?”

“What?”

“Would you have introduced me?”

“I…” Dean sighed, “No.”

“Why?”

“Because…” Dean sighed again.

“Because this was just dating and supposed to be fun.” Benny finished far better than Dean could have.

“Yeah.”

“You have a pretty serious ex don’t you?”

“Not exactly,” Dean looked up and Benny was kind of smiling. It was a peace offering smile. “We fucked, but I wanted…” Dean closed his eyes, he’d told himself the months he’d known Cas that he was fine with being a fuck buddy, but now…without Cas… “I want _him_.”

“And he wanted to leave and you couldn’t force him to stay.” Dean nodded. “Did I help?” Dean looked up at the honest question on Benny’s face.

“Yeah,” Dean nodded.

“Good.”

***

Dean started going back to the dog park after that. He and Benny were good and Dean was tired of hiding. He also wanted to say his piece and tell Cas how he felt. If the man still wanted to walk away then Dean would be ok with that. He just wanted to speak his feelings with the only man he felt anything for.

Sam’s energy was back and he seemed on the same mission as Dean. He’d scope the dog park as soon as they entered and would sigh heavily when Eliza was missing. He made up for it by running around like a fool and playing endless hours of Frisbee with Dean.

As October was coming to a close Dean was ready to give up his search.

Then came the day when Sam nearly tore the leash out of his hands before they got into the park.

“Hey, Buddy calm down,” Dean grunted and as soon as they were safely behind the fence and unclipped Sam was off.

He’d found Eliza.

Dean jogged up to them and scratched the Newfoundland’s ears.

“Eliza! Don’t play with strangers!” a man ran up to the dog. He had sandy hair and a mischievous face. There was a light behind his eyes and Dean’s mind lit up with a name.

“Gabriel?”

“Yes…” the man was wary, he had a notebook in his hand and they watched as the two dogs trotted off.

“Dean Winchester.” The man still looked confused and then a light entered his eyes.

“Dean! You’re Dean! _The_ Dean!”

“So he talked about me?” Gabriel huffed.

“Yeah but he tried to be causal about it, like he ran into you at the café, or here,” Dean laughed. “He was right, your dog is beautiful.”

“Yeah Eliza is awesome too, why’d you pick a Newfoundland?”

Gabe tilted his head in question. “Eliza isn’t my dog. She’s Castiel’s. I would have thought he would have told you. He always goes on about his dog.” Dean shook his head.

“No, he said she was yours. He said he wanted a dog but his apartment wouldn’t allow it.”

“Oh well yeah, but they were moving out when Bal bought Eliza. She was a new house present, Bal snuck her in and tied a red balloon to her collar. She waddled around and was adorable.” Dean’s face made Gabe stop. “Fuck, he didn’t tell you about Bal did he?”

“No,” Dean slowly shook his head.

“Fuck,” Gabriel muttered. “Fuck, Cassie is going to kill me.”

“Well he’s already decided he doesn’t want me so it’s not going to hurt.”

“Oh he wants you,” Gabe muttered he’d heard his little brother going on and on and _on_ about Dean. About how he felt he was cheating on Bal. About how he was afraid he was falling in love with Dean and was forgetting Balthazar.

And two months ago when he dropped his dog off and looked about as sad as when Bal died and said Dean was at the park with someone.

“When did they break up?” Dean wanted to take his chance while he had it.

“They didn’t,” Gabe looked up, “Balthazar died. Aneurysm, no one knew about it and he just…died. It was three years ago, and Cas just…stopped. He’s still in the same apartment, he’s still got his half packed boxes waiting to go to a house that isn’t there anymore.” Dean sighed. “He talks to him…” Gabriel was wary, “Cassie, he talks to Bal all the time…”

“My brother died nine years ago and I talk to my dog the way I would him, I can understand.” Gabriel nodded.

“It makes sense, then, why Cassie likes you.”

“Where is he?” Gabriel looked wary, “I just want to talk to him, if he turns me away I’ll leave. I…” Dean’s voice faltered just a bit, “I love him.” Gabriel smirked a bit and gave Dean the address.

“Sammy,” Dean called and clapped Cas’s brother on the shoulder. The dog came bounding up and Dean whispered in his ear as he clipped the leash on, “Operation Hookup.”

Cas’s apartment happened to be seven blocks from the dog park in the opposite direction of Dean’s house.

The place was old and Dean took a look down at his dog. Sam must have caught the scent of Cas and his tail was going like mad and he was squeaking pulling Dean along.

“Hey,” Dean tugged once hard at the leash. “Sammy they don’t let dogs in here so you’re going to have to keep it together. Calm down,” Sam calmed instantly and was silent by his side. Dean looked around like a criminal and they snuck in. Cas’s apartment was on the third floor so the two sneaked and were in front of Cas’s door. Sam knocked his head against Dean’s leg and gave the man all the courage he needed.

“Who is it?” a voice called faintly getting louder.

“Pizza,” Dean grunted and the door opened.

“Dean?!” Cas didn’t know if he wanted close the door or let Dean in. The man read the indecision and looked down at Sam who was trying desperately to keep his cool.

“Hey come on he’s kind of contraband here.” Cas huffed and opened the door. Sam rushed in and Dean followed. He let the leash go and the dog went around snuffling at everything. The apartment was silent as the two men watched the happy dog.

“He’s named after my brother.” Dean said softly. He wanted to tell his whole story, his feelings and then Cas would make his decision. “Sammy was diagnosed with cancer when he was ten. Mom died when I was five so it was dad, Sam, and me. The cancer went away when he was eleven, but came back when he was nineteen. He died when he was twenty two.” Dean looked at his dog who was happily sniffing around. “Dad died when Sammy was still a teenager but I was eighteen so I could be his legal guardian. We had an uncle, Bobby, but he died right before Sammy’s cancer came back.” Dean looked away to his goofball who was now in the bedroom on the bed and lying on a pillow smiling contentedly and closing his eyes in happiness. “And I still live in my parent’s house and I know I have nothing to offer except myself, but I…”

“Dean, I…”

“I love you.” Dean looked up at never ending blue eyes. “I’m telling you my story because I haven’t had an easy life. I have lost and I _know_ what love is. I love you.”

“Dean,” Dean couldn’t stand the pitying pain in Cas’s voice. “I can’t, I would…” Cas leaned on the couch as far as he could be away from Dean. “My boyfriend died, three years ago. I was ready to marry him, I loved him, I had my life planned to spend eternity with him.” Cas closed his eyes when tears came to them. “And then he died. He died and everything I was planning was gone. And if I start anything with you I’m going to forget him, and I can’t forget him.”

“I won’t let you forget him,” Dean walked slowly up and held Cas’s hips gently. “He’s always going to be a part of you. You won’t forget him.”

“I can’t,” Cas whispered, he looked at Dean’s gentle eyes, “I want to love you,” Cas closed his eyes hard. “I want to love you so badly, but what if I forget…”

“It won’t mean that you didn’t love him,” Dean gently cupped Cas’s face, “It won’t mean that he’s gone forever or that you didn’t make him happy or that you’re letting him down. Every time I smiled after Sam died I felt guilty as if I should be feeling sad because he was gone. When I adopted Sammy I found out how happy I could be and that it was ok to be happy.”

“Is it…” Cas looked like he was about to jump off a cliff, “It’s ok to be happy,” he whispered.

“It’s ok to be happy, baby,” Dean murmured and Cas kissed him softly. Their kisses lasted and were full of love as they wrapped around one another.

“Dean?” Cas broke away after about ten minutes of slow kissing. “I love you.” They connected hands and moved toward the bedroom only to find a very contented, sleeping dog resting his head on Bal’s pillow.

***

“Damn it Sammy I’m going to kill you!” Dean shouted as a cold nose was pressed into his arch. He jumped out of bed and heard his dumb ass dog running away. Another set of paws of a much heavier animal joined his goofball as the two dogs ran through the house.

“Mmm, I think it’s snowing,” Cas rumbled on the bed. Dean flopped back down and snuggled under the heavy blankets. Cas had convinced him when he moved in that Dean didn’t have to stay in his old room, that no one would judge him if he moved into his parent’s room. He also convinced Dean to get rid of everything the man didn’t like, which turned out to be pretty much every item and also the wall colors, and the upstairs carpet, and the bathroom tile, ooh and the kitchen countertops. Dean joked that Cas had hooked himself a fixer-upper and the man just smiled and said he loved DIY. And after a year of working on the house they were almost done.

“Was it supposed to?” Dean curled back into his boyfriend and nosed at his neck earing a small giggle.

“It’s what the news said last night.” Dean groaned.

“You know what that means,” he caught dancing blue eyes as they heard two idiots running from window to window downstairs.

“We’re gonna have to take them to the dog park.” They both said in unison.

So an hour later, bundled and scarved up Dean and Cas took two crazy dogs to the park. As soon as he was off his leash Sam was rolling in the snow and yipping in pleasure. Cas stayed curled under Dean’s arm as they watched the two play. Then Eliza saw something and was off with Cas chasing after her.

“Sammy!” Dean called and the furry face covered in snow, seriously that dog had an addiction, snapped to him, “Come here,” he trotted over and looked eagerly at Dean. Dean leaned in and slipped a ring on Sammy’s collar. They’d had the talk last night (Cas having no idea Dean had bought the ring the day after he went to Cas’s apartment for the first time) and Cas had said he was comfortable with marriage.

“Operation Hookup, Sammy,” and the dog was off like a rocket. Dean laughed as he landed at Cas’s feet and rolled on his back. He watched as Cas bent down to give a belly rub and then as his boyfriend’s shoulders froze as he saw Sam’s collar.

Cas rose slowly and turned. His face shining with tears and nodding like an idiot.

Operation Hookup was a success.


End file.
